GOD

Wooh. That picture's kinda scary. Anyhoodle, today we're going to talk a little bit about Jeezus. Jeezus will be watching over the next few months reeeally carefully. Everywhere you turn, there he'll be, tripping up perfectly ordinary issues with his big old feet, shouldering his way into debates you never even dreamed he might show up at.

in 2004, George Bush Junior won 78% of the evangelical Christian vote, to John Kerry's 21%. While the Evangelical vote isn't, as most Europeans believe, a MASSIVE voting block, when elections are as close as they were in 2000 and 2004, how everyone votes is crucial. The Evangelical vote made a real difference. There are two types of Evangelicals: hard-line conservatives, and what some pundits term "freesyle" Evangelicals. Freestyle Evangelicals tend to be pretty moderate, and not necessarily Republican voters. It's worth noting that in the 90s Bill Clinton won not just the Freestyle vote, but quite a bit of the Crazy vote as well. The again, Blinton really liked Jeezus a whole lot. Jeezus with the babbling and the snakes and all.

While Evangelical Christians are not necessarily the batshit conservatives that Europe sniggeringly terms them, they do like the Lord, and they're not alone in America. Fred Thompson has just waved buh-bye to everyone by admitting that he only goes to church when his mom drags him there by the ear. "I know I'm right with God, and with those I love." he says. Yeeeah. But why don't you like church? Makes you feel a little uncomfortable, huh Fred? OR DO YOU HATE BABY JESUS?