Election 2008 OR...The Archers?

Sorry, guess we must have passed out in a drunken stupor on the couch after the 300th New Debate Format Extravaganza. Even PAID bloggers don't try to do too much. Where are we now? Hold on a sec...ok. Right. Weeee're...pretty much where we left off! Turns out this race is like The Archers: 3 updates a day, and you could emigrate for fifty years without much happening. Though at least the Archers had a gay marriage, and, while our great aunt threw her embroidery across the room when it happened, that was a price Radio 4 was willing to pay, unlike SOME leaders of the free world we could mention.

Jeez, something must have happened. Ok, ok, everyone got all het up about Hill-Clint's laugh:
and you can kinda see their point. It looks like she's about to kill us. But then again, we like that about her, right?

John Edwards was accused of cheating on his (AWESOME, DYING, SHOULD-TOTALLY-BE-PRESIDENT) wife. There are no links to this story available on the internet anymore, which means that The National Enquirer was probably about to get the living bejesus sued out of them by the Edwards Campaign. Edwards also seems to have been losing some ground in Iowa, his last chance saloon, to Obama AND Hillary. This makes us so depressed we want to get drunk and pass out again.

We'd like to give a shout out to our new fave columnist: Gail Collins of the New York Times. Click here to read her on baby boomers and Hillary.


Hillary is winning. Everything. Still. But seriously, read Gail Collins. And listen to the Archers. And hell, have a slice of cake. Aaah; it's good to be back.

Raise High John Edwards

John Edwards, the Little Mill Worker that Could, was endorsed yesterday by the Steel and Coal Mining Unions. Since Edwards has been pole-dancing frantically for organised labour for the last few months, this isn't going to come as a body-blow for Hill and Barry. Also, Chris Dodd, (you know HIM. You know, that guy with the silver hair. No, silly, the other one) just got the Firefighter's Union to come to his party, and while that's very lovely and all, it doesn't mean he's the NPOTUS. Ah, who are we kidding, we're only so mean about John Edwards cos we lurve him. Yes, dammit, we're in love with John Edwards, and we don't care who knows it. If people don't vote for him, they're f**king retarded. Dese unions have got the right idea.

Aaand they're off!

Last weekend was Labour day across the pond. To The Monocle, Labour day (or Labor Day if you will) is the moment in which New York City stops being a blissful, empty adventure playground and fills up once again with a**holes back from their Hamptons house shares. To the names on the 2008 sign-up sheet hung outside the Cafeteria of Destiny, Labor Day heralds the gunshot that starts the sprint to the primaries.

From here till what will seem like the end of time and is in fact next January, candidates will be careering along at warp speed, and political commentators will be frantically interpreting their every move. A new haircut, a new stump speech, a new voice-pitch, a particular tie...all will create first furious gossip, then serious analysis in the New York Times. Though surely no candidate would be s'darn foolhardy as to get a new haircut this late in the game. Which means it's probably all over for John Edwards: